Emotional Void
by Midnyght Saber
Summary: Between "Shades of Gray" and "Fanning the Flames". After the fake-out make-out in the park, Sam is torn apart inside by the pain she's feeling, unable to bear the agony of trying to tell Danny that she loves him, knowing that all she'll get is rejection.


**Disclaimer:** _Danny Phantom_ and all related characters and information are the property of Butch Hartman and Viacom International Inc. "Easier to Run" is the property of Linkin Park and Warner Bros. Records, owned by Warner Music Group.

* * *

_What was I thinking? I don't believe I did that…I am so stupid!_

Sam walked into her room, slamming the door behind her. She walked over to her bed and promptly began beating her head against the wall. "Stupid," she muttered as her head hit wall. "Stupid." Thunk. "Stupid." Thunk. "Stupid." Thunk.

This action was continued for nearly five minutes, and only stopped when she started to develop a mild headache, choosing to berate herself as she laid down on her bed.

**It's easier to run**

**Replacing this pain with something numb**

_I am such a fool! _Sam thought, rubbing her forehead gently. Running her fingertips slowly downward, her hand found its way to her lips, still burning with the heat of the kiss she and Danny had shared in the park that afternoon.

_NO! _She chided herself. _I can't like him! He's my best friend, not my boyfriend!_

**It's so much easier to go**

**Than face all this pain here all alone**

A single tear rolled down her cheek, leaving a small watermark on the pillow, and she clenched her fists into the sheets, fighting the inner demons of her feelings, striving to keep the doors of her heart sealed.

**Something has been taken**

**From deep inside of me**

**A secret I've kept locked away**

**No one can ever see**

She often wished that Danny would one day see her as more than just a friend, but the thought of shattering their friendship over her feelings scared her witless, and she could not bear to tell him the truth. True, she had kissed him earlier that day, but she struggled to find a way to hide the joy surging inside her. Covering and telling him that she'd needed to shock him out of ghost form to save him from Valerie, they came to accept that it had been spur-of-the-moment and that nothing had actually happened between them.

Sam, however, could not fight the rising tide surging within her now that she'd thought back on that event, and she screamed at herself that there was nothing between her and Danny, and that as long as their friendship meant something, there never would be.

**Wounds so deep**

**They never show**

**They never go away**

**Like moving pictures in my head**

**For years and years they've played**

This had been a developing issue for Sam over the past few years, and something she'd tried valiantly to bury as a childish fascination with her friend. That resolve hadn't stood against her emotions, and Danny was, and remained, her first and only crush.

Not that the goth would ever admit it to anyone that she _had _a crush in the first place. The fact that she had the crush at all didn't help when it came to being around Danny, and since high school had started, it seemed that he was becoming more and more distant, a fact that she could attribute less to his ghost powers and more to the shallow wench of the freshman class.

**If I could change, I would**

**Take back the pain, I would**

**Retrace every wrong move that I made, I would**

**If I could stand up and take the blame, I would**

**If I could take all my shame to the grave, I would**

She often found herself wondering what would have happened had this affection never developed in the first place, and considered that she may be less bothered by being around him, but in the long run, would also suffer the fate of seeing her best friend taken from her by some girl that didn't deserve him.

Sometimes, she wished that her feelings would just vanish, figuring that life would be better for them all if she didn't care as much as she did for Danny.

**If I could change, I would**

**Take back the pain, I would**

**Retrace every wrong move that I made, I would**

**If I could stand up and take the blame, I would**

**I would take all my shame to the grave**

Deep inside, two truths buried themselves in her thoughts. The first was that wishing, even if Desiree was involved, wouldn't change how she felt about Danny. The second was that she knew that she'd never have the guts to stand up to the hybrid and let him know how she truly felt.

**It's easier to run**

**Replacing this pain with something numb**

Rolling further onto her side, she forcefully nestled her face in her pillow, fighting the rising onslaught of tears that were coming to her eyes.

**It's easier to go**

**Than face all this pain here all alone**

Slowly falling into a fitful and restless sleep, Sam's eyes began to release their long-withheld tears of sorrow and pity.

- - - - -

**Sometimes, I remember**

**The darkness of my past**

**Bringing back these memories**

**I wish I didn't have**

A week had passed since the labeled 'fake-out make-out' in the park, and all seven of those days had taken their toll on Sam, as she had only grown more uncomfortable and uneasy around Danny.

As if being around him in school wasn't bad enough, he'd asked her and Tucker to come over to his house after school.

**Sometimes I think of letting go**

**And never looking back**

**And never moving forward**

**So there'd never be a past**

Even if she truly cared for only Danny and knew that they could never be together, it wouldn't be worth it to take her own life. There would be a lot more to live for.

**If I could change, I would**

**Take back the pain, I would**

**Retrace every wrong move that I made, I would**

**If I could stand up and take the blame, I would**

**If I could take all my shame to the grave, I would**

Sam slowly trudged towards the Fenton house, her head bent towards the ground. She wasn't ready for this. She didn't want to have to face him.

**If I could change, I would**

**Take back the pain, I would**

**Retrace every wrong move that I made, I would**

**If I could stand up and take the blame, I would**

**I would take all my shame to the grave**

Before she knew it, and well before she'd prepared herself for having to spend time with her friends, one who she was entirely in love with and one who wouldn't let it go if he found out. Raising her hand, she paused, almost considering leaving and just staying at home. Resigning herself to whatever fate awaited her, she knocked on the front door.

Danny opened the door and smiled softly, and Sam had to bite back her own smile. He was just happy that she'd come, but that simple fact hadn't kept her insides from melting nor the burning sensation from returning to her lips.

**Just washing it aside**

**All of my helplessness inside**

**Pretending I don't feel misplaced**

**Is so much simpler than change**

The pair walked into the basement, Danny switching forms as they reached the lab. Tucker was far too absorbed in his PDA to notice their entry, and Sam snatched the piece of technology from his hands.

"Hey!"

"We've got work to do," Danny quipped as he grabbed four little pieces of green and silver metal from a table in the lab. Toggling their switches one by one, all four now operating, he handed two to each of his friends. "Dad's latest invention," he replied to Tucker's questioning look. "They're supposed to let us talk in the Ghost Zone."

"What's wrong with walkie-talkies?" Sam asked, pulling her hair back as she put the first of the ear clips on.

"Dad claims that the static on normal walkie-talkies is caused by spectral interference. These are supposed to filter out any ectoplasmic audio frequencies.

"But that would mean that we can't talk with you?" Sam piped up.

"I think being human would actually help me bypass the spectral block the Fenton Phones have built in."

"Let's hope so," Tucker and Sam said in unison, both now wearing their communicators , as they climbed into the Specter Speeder.

Danny phazed in behind them, standing with a hand on the pilot's seat. "Now, onto today's plan – mapping out the Ghost Zone."

**It's easier to run**

**Replacing this pain with something numb**

"Lame name, by the way," Tucker cut in as Danny put his own pair in place.

"Blame Dad. It was his idea to call them that."

As Danny phazed through the seat and sat down, his leg accidently rubbed up against Sam's, the sudden surge of butterflies overtaking her stomach and causing her to reflexively rub her stomach.

"Sam, are you okay?" Danny asked worriedly.

"Fine," she replied quickly. "I'm just a little hungry. I'll worry about it later."

**It's so much easier to go**

**Than face all this pain here all alone**

Clenching the steering column, Sam cursed her uncontrollable hormones, nudging the throttle forward, the eerie green glow of the Ghost Zone enveloping them.

Stopping the speeder about two hundred yards from the Portal, raising an eyebrow as Danny pulled a pad of paper and a mechanical pencil out from under the seat and handed her the items.

"You're the best when it comes to drawing, Sam. Please?"

The child-like pleading was too much for Sam, and she sighed, taking the pad from Danny as he phazed out of the Speeder. Clicking the lead forward slightly, she began her sketch.

**It's easier to run…**

Within minutes, their simple foray into the Zone had become yet another battle in Danny's long string of ghost encounters. Pinned down by a large, pajama-clad ghost, Sam sat there, feeling useless as she was unable to help him.

Tucker wasn't as affected by the recent turn of events, commenting that the Phones were a major fashion faux pas, finally figuring out how to hack into the Phones with his PDA, cuing up the latest teen idols' song, _Remember_.

Toggling the frequency dial on her earpieces, she managed to shut out the horrid sound that had been emitted from her own pair of Phones, changing the point of conversation. "They're not stupid. I think they make great techno-goth earrings." Despite their vibrant green coloration, she actually did like the small inventions.

Danny had been on a close enough frequency to catch what she'd said, and in the midst of batting aside the ghost, he replied, "Really? Hey, maybe I should give a pair to Paulina." That last sentence came out only seconds before the ghost snapped his hand over Danny's mouth.

_Oh, thanks, Danny. Just great. I mention something positive about our ghost hunting activities, and you have to bring up that little…I said TECHNO-GOTH! _She huffed softly. "Yes, Danny, that's what I'm saying. Give a pair to Paulina." The sarcasm was so heavy in her voice that she was almost sure the Phones would end up melting, but she was sure Danny had actually failed to notice the oozing wads of derision in her voice.

**If I could change, I would**

**Take back the pain, I would**

**Retrace every wrong move that I made**

Sam bit back any continuation of her retort, biting her lip against the fact that she was practically ready to explode at the object of her affection.

**It's easier to go…**

Sam watched, thoroughly spaced out, as Danny ran from the ghost that had been crushing him to death in a hug, keeping just ahead of him. In an effort to keep Danny within his grasp, he incased Danny in a block of ice.

It only took a few seconds for Danny to charge up enough ectoplasm to blast his way out, and once more, he took off. He managed to get to a refrigerator door floating in the Zone, pulled the door open, and secured the ghost in wherever the doorway led to.

Phazing back into the Speeder, he went human, instantaneously shivering. "Can a ghost get frostbite?" He asked, desperately trying to warm his hands.

"Oh, here, my hands are warm," Sam said, taking his hands in hers, a blush running to her face. Her heart jumped when she saw a blush rise to his face as well, but Tucker chose that exact moment to burst into song, singing along very off-key.

"Uh…I think I'm gonna need my hands for this," Danny said, pulling his hands from Sam's, covering his ears.

One thing crossed Sam's mind as she piloted the Speeder out of the Ghost Zone.

_Why was he blushing? Does that mean that he…but he likes Paulina…doesn't he?_

**If I could change, I would**

**Take back the pain, I would**

**Retrace every wrong move that I made, I would**

**If I could stand up and take the blame, I would**

**I would take all my shame to the grave**


End file.
